There is one group of women I envy so much that my jaws hurt. I’m talking about these fortunate, mysterious creatures who put on a white shirt, top, or blouse, go through a very busy day, and emerge at the end of it with the white garment looking as fresh and clean as it did in the morning. I just met a woman like that and I have absolutely no idea how she manages it.
Whenever I put on a shirt, I somehow manage to mess it up while walking from my closet to the front door. And I don’t live in a palace, so it isn’t like there is a long stretch to walk.
How do some people manage to stay put together, crisp and fresh while others gradually fall apart as they go about the day? And it isn’t just the clothes. I always discover that by the end of the day, my hair looks like puppies have been sucking on it (that’s a Ukrainian expression), my makeup has ended up all over my clothes and my phone, and I’ve acquired a new scratch, bump or bruise.
Clarissa's Blog 
Coffee, the squirty juice of a peeled orange, and barbecue sauce are the banes of my blouses.
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I seem to cover myself in weirdly colored gunk that I can’t even identify. I stare at it and wonder where it could have possibly come from. It’s like an alien substance that keeps finding me.
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Alas, I have no idea how they do it either. I have purchased only one white blouse in the last twelve years; I managed to get it irrecoverably stained with pomegranate juice within three hours of wearing it.
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I can’t wear white anywhere, so I don’t. I choose dark colours simply because I am untidy. I once saw a female aviator wearing light blue, and I agree it was impressive. Really, though, I need chunky clothes that are extremely dark. Leather is good as nothing much sticks to it.
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HA!! I know EXACTLY what you are talking about! How do they do it??? They are aliens! Aliens I say!!! 🙂
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I don’t believe it. I’ll bet she carries a stash of identical white shirts with her wherever she goes, and when she has the inevitable mishap with coffee or tomato sauce, just runs into the nearest bathroom and changes.
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She carries an emergency laundry kit with her. Or you’re an extra trapped in a bleach or stain repellent commercial that never ends and as such you magically attract wine, chocolate, grass, lint, and baby prints to your white shirt.
:p
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