Psychoanalysts

~ Clarissa

I’m not supposed to write about what happens in the sessions but this I just have to share because it is too funny.

“I’ve changed so much as a result of analysis!” I said. “I could have never imagined that instead of a favorite bar I’d have a favorite gym. Or that I would want to buy a house in a quiet street. Or that I wouldn’t feel restless in the evenings and just prefer to stay at home reading.”

“That’s not analysis,” the analyst retorted. “You’re just getting old.”

Before people say, “Oh God, what a cruel analyst,” I have to explain that I think the analyst is simply mirroring my way of interacting back at me.

I think that analysts adapt their communication styles to patients a lot. For instance, N’s analyst is so quiet as to be almost catatonic. Mine, however, is gregarious, exuberant, he interrupts a lot, waves his hands about, and is very loud. And I don’t believe this is at all natural to him. He just has to be this way with me because if he just sits there while I perform, no work will get done. The poor guy must be exhausted after these sessions because he’s a Scot, and Scots have a very different emotional range from Ukrainians.

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Published by Clarissa

15 thoughts on “Psychoanalysts”

  1. I can’t keep up with the Yankee emotional range. It’s very extreme and very narrow. I can’ t do the pop psychology aspect of it. For instance I explain something complex and it is reduced to something else, so simple that it is entirely different. And then all sorts of false causal links are invoked (the pop psychology). You can’t make sense of the world that way. Those short cuts aren’t really short cuts but dead ends. And that would be okay, too, if one didn’t have to deal with the addendum of pop psychology, which says that if I do not answer in particular ways I am being evasive. It’s frustrating to deal with this garden variety moron, the one I am currently talking to on YouTube.

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    1. For instance, I say something that people familiar with a lot of third world/developing countries would understand — that a lot of the political operations of the country are based around the capacity to bluff your way through. And the guy says you mean [Africans] are gullible? I say no. He says, “oh, I see what you mean. you mean they are unusually perceptive.” I say no.

      Actually, I mean what I originally said. Not gullible and not unusually perceptive per se, but operating on the political basis of bluff.

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    2. I should add that the inability to take any criticism whatsoever, or to view oneself from another’s perspective is what leads to this increasingly narrow and hysterical emotional range in the Yank. He is only interested in reassuring noises that tell him he already knows everything that is humanly knowable.

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      1. Its interesting Muster, you do to the yanks what a lot of sexists do to women. You paint them all with the same brush. Fascinating for sure.

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  3. “I’m not getting old, you’re falling into clichés!”

    “No, you’re the one falling into clichés!”

    I strongly suspect this would turn into a professional game of “I Know You Are, But What Am I?” … 🙂

    Speaking of games, ever given Eric Berne’s “Games People Play” a read?

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      1. When “If it weren’t for you” gets combined with “Let’s pull a fast one on Joey”, the results can be extremely damaging.

        Think of it as a double-ended game that’s played in a professional situation where someone needs to consolidate power. Once you see what it is, you’re always going to be watching for it …

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  4. Not being restless at night and being relaxed and focused enough to read can just be a result of going to the gym during the day. It really has that effect.

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