1. The number of foreign movies allowed to be shown in Russia will be limited so that at least 50% of all movies shown are Russian. Of course, Russia produces a very limited number of films, but patriotism matters more than reality and math.
2. The governmental party United Russia that lost all support after the shamelessly rigged elections of 2011 now has 56% approval rating for the first time in 5 years. Patriotism, of course, matters more than honesty and a lot more than something as inconsequential as democracy.
3. University students are obligated to reveal their opinions on the annexation of the Crimea and those whose opinions are not the approved ones are castigated. Unanimity in the face of a foreign threat is a lot more important than freedom of speech.
4. Schools have to reintroduce “political information hours” we all remember from the Soviet times. During these info sessions, students are to be informed of the correct approach to the current political situation.
5. Stalin’s physical fitness norms aimed at keeping citizens prepared for military action are being reintroduced as “homage to our national historical traditions“. Of course, being prepared for battle and offering homage to Stalin is more important than respecting people’s right to control their own bodies.
6. Articles started appearing in Russian press, openly celebrating the return to the USSR. Of course, some of them are written by notorious anti-semites but the recovery of the Soviet Union means more than the unhappiness of some annoying Jews, all of whom are oligarchs in need of being disciplined anyways.
7. Russian troops are hovering on the border with Ukraine in massive numbers prepared for immediate invasion. More troops are being brought into the area. In the meanwhile, Obama is valiantly pushing back with an “our gays are marginally better off than your gays” speech, hoping to will the reborn USSR out of existence by appeals to “Western ideals and values of openness and tolerance.” Of course, a chance to make a beautiful speech matters a lot more than knowing what effect your words will have on your opponent.
8. In the meanwhile, even the most intelligent among the Westerners drawl that the Crimea “a small area inside Russia’s sphere of influence, hyped by our hawks into a world-shaking incident“. Of course, the freedom to pretend that the world outside of the nearest mall doesn’t exist is a lot more important than a return to the Cold War.
Clarissa's Blog 
In the middle of a sea of woozy banality, your piercing vision and respect for truth are like an island on which one can occasionally take refuge 🙂
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In the middle of a sea of woozy banality, your piercing insight and respect for truth is like an island on which one can occasionally take refuge 🙂
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It’ll never make the western papers, but the Finns had Russian troops ‘exercising’ on the border in massive numbers a few months back.
The Crimea just happens to be the first bottle that a blundering west knocked off the wall and gave Putin the excuse needed to ‘catch it’. But was ready to go on all possible fronts, just waiting to see which one would be the first opportunity.
You watch. Putin will continue on the Ukraine/Transnistira front until momentum gives out, at which point he’ll offer the west the face-saving “he didn’t cross into NATO”. Then, while the west frantically goes about preparing a ‘defense’ of Poland and the Czech Republic, Putin will be laughing and preparing his next move in a completely different theater, and we’ll be flat-footed again…
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Do you think this situation could lead to actual war instead of just a Cold War? I am worried about this, perhaps wrongly.
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No, I don’t think so. At the moment, military aggression towards the West is more likely from North Korea than Russia. That’s a source of aggression I’m most worried about.
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