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Clarissa's Blog

An academic's opinions on feminism, politics, literature, philosophy, teaching, academia, and a lot more.

I Meet the Other Woman

The descent into Baltimore was long, and my ears were completely plugged. When I arrived at my hotel, I could barely hear anything. In order to avoid accidentally screaming at the receptionist, I silently handed him the paper with the reservation N had gotten for me. (He’s the hotel and flight specialist in the family.)

“Oh, hello, Mrs. N,” the receptionist said, looking at the paper. “Let’s me pull up your reservation.” 

He clicked a few keys, stared at the screen, and his face fell. He looked at me, at my paper, at the screen, clicked some more, stared some more, and started shifting uncomfortably.

“I’m so sorry, Mrs. N,” he mumbled finally. “There’s something. . . erm. . . something that will possibly be upsetting that I need to communicate to you.”

“Ah, they must have given my room to somebody else because I came in late,” I thought.

But I was wrong. 

“Mrs. N, your husband seems to have placed another woman in your room,” the receptionist said, his voice trembling. “Her name is Professor Bulochkina.”

“It’s OK,” I reassured the poor receptionist who probably feared a huge scandal. “I’m Bulochkina.”

And hey, these are the Eastcoasters who think we are flyover podunksters while they can’t imagine the situation where married people have different last names. 

This is a funnier story than even my notorious one-night stand story.

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4 thoughts on “I Meet the Other Woman

  1. You should totally have begun singing this…

    No matter the situation, Lorett’as done ssaid it all.

    Like

  2. nelson on said:

    “The descent into Baltimore was long, and my ears were completely plugged. When I arrived at my hotel, I could barely hear anything.”

    That reminds me of an old 1940s clip I saw of a Moms Mabley joke. She said her ears were all stuffed up after a flight. She couldn’t hear a thing. The lady at the airport advised her to “drop her jaw” and Moms yelled “What??” and the lady repeated “Drop your jaw!!”

    And then Moms was kicked out of the airport for dropping her drawers.

    Like

  3. Now I’m super curious about the one night stand story

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    • N and I once went to a conference in Chicago. At the hotel, he got flustered, and instead of “one-night stay” told the valet that we were there “for a one-night stand.”

      When I went to Montreal, I shared the story with a single friend. But the story went viral. Years later, complete strangers in Montréal would exclaim, “Ah, so you are the one-night stand girl!”

      Like

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