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Clarissa's Blog

An academic's opinions on feminism, politics, literature, philosophy, teaching, academia, and a lot more.

Tantrums

Klara has learned to throw tantrums. Her whole nature is in how she conducts them. She gets down on the floor very carefully, making sure she doesn’t hurt herself, arranges herself on the floor with meticulous care, and begins to scream.

I move to another room and start collecting the toys. She gets up, finds me, arranges herself very carefully on the floor again, and resumes the screaming. Then she notices that I’m doing something fun, switches off the screaming, giggles, and joins me.

I have no idea where she learned the laying down on the floor in protest strategy.

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12 thoughts on “Tantrums

  1. I have no idea where she learned the laying down on the floor in protest strategy.

    Other kids at daycare?

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  2. Stringer Bell on said:

    How would you deal with it if/when she does that in public?

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    • If it’s someplace like a store, that’s easy because there are tons of interesting new objects to distract her. The other day she started screaming at Hallmark because I accidentally pinched her with the stroller buckle. And it was a bad pinch, it left a mark. But I distracted her with Mickey mouse figurines and she was laughing in literally seconds. At home it’s harder because I don’t have many new objects I can produce at a moment’s notice.

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      • Stringer Bell on said:

        That’s a great strategy. Though, her reacting to actual physical pain is not what I’d call a tantrum. I wonder if it would work the same when she meticulously plans out a tantrum by lying down on the floor of the supermarket and screaming.

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        • She’s at an age where she is still easily distracted by world’s unfolding wonders. When she’s older, we will see.

          N asked what my mother did when I threw tantrums. I collapsed with laughter. The idea that I’d be allowed something like a tantrum is very funny.

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          • Stringer Bell on said:

            I don’t remember what I did when I was very little, of course, but around 5th or 6th grade the most common way for me to express my anger was refusing to eat a meal. Not even an extended fast, like Gandhi haha. Just one meal. Mom could never call my bluff.

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  3. el on said:

    \ N asked what my mother did when I threw tantrums. I collapsed with laughter. The idea that I’d be allowed something like a tantrum is very funny.

    I asked my mother and she said I had no tantrums. May be, she has forgotten. May be, they were very rare. May be, (my idea) I was permitted practically everything, so felt no need for them.

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  4. Anon on said:

    My daughter had a lot of tantrums around the age of 2. When she was a little older, two and a half or so, we would ask her whenever she had one: “Sweetie, are you mad? Why are you mad?” etc

    Usually this helped her collect her thoughts together, and she would slowly calm down.

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    • It’s very very normal at this age. If anything, I’d worry about a child who doesn’t throw tantrums.

      The always polite, quiet, obedient kids grow up into the saddest, most fucked up adults.

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  5. “Klara has learned to throw tantrums”

    I think “learned” is the key word here. These don’t sound like tantrums, they sound like a performance of tantrums that she’s seen. In real tantrums there’s nothing careful or planned (though some children might hype themselves up to get into the tantrum zone) and not easy to distract.

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