Not My Deal

I’m not writing about Ireland’s abortion referendum because I have always believed that abortion rights should only ever be discussed by people who might one day need an abortion.

There is no likelihood of an accidental, unwanted pregnancy at my age, so I’m out of this particular discussion. The events in Ireland are a big deal, but they are not my big deal any more. I think it’s important to know when it’s time to exit a discussion and leave it to others.


23 thoughts on “Not My Deal”

  1. “I have always believed that abortion rights should only ever be discussed by people who might one day need an abortion.” <

    This rule would mean that male politicians and justices could never discussion abortion rights — so the laws and court rulings that have made abortions legal in many countries would never have been passed.


  2. Why not “racism should only be discussed by African-Americans, antisemitism – by Jews, welfare – by poor”?
    Or a claim that only women should discuss the situation of women in countries like Saudi Arabia?


  3. I disagree with your position because

    A – social justice activists don’t have to fight only for issues relating to them. You participated in BLM on campuss despite not being black, so you agree with this.

    B -there are so few people of any gender writing about those issues, so if every woman for whom it wasn’t relevant stopped, hardly any would be left. I have a suspicion that often it’s precisely older and bolder women who fight for women rights, not 18 year olds for whom it’s super relevant, but who haven’t yet found their voice and freedom from socially imposed “you are a loose woman to need birth control, let alone abortion.”


    1. el is right on a broader point than the abortion issue. While abortion was generally considered legal in primitive times before men in power specifically outlawed it, the broader issues that el mentions (general rights for women, treatment of races naturally considered inferior, and other behaviors like discrimination against the mentally ill and sexually non-conforming individuals) were by nature considered as wrong and thus “illegal” without any specific laws being passed to say so.

      Absent specific actions to correct these situations by (mostly white male) politicians not directly associated with/by them, they’d still be illegal today.


      1. Dreidel, you are simply wrong. Abortion was very wide-spread long past the primitive times. Medieval Europe was very much at peace with it. Every village had its own sage woman who knew five hundred and one natural method of aborting. This all started to get clamped down with the birth of Enlightenment and capitalism. The whole process began precisely with the passing of laws that prohibited this formerly unregulated activity.


        1. “Medieval Europe was very much at peace with it.” <

          I didn’t say otherwise. You misunderstood what I consider to be “in primitive times.” Medieval Europe was still primitive in many ways.


    2. It doesn’t feel the same. It simply doesn’t.

      And I object to being associated with social justice folks in any way. Abortion has won. The socially imposed narrative is now that of consumerism, Tinder and procreation as a consumption good. Nobody is criticized for having too much sex but for having too little.


          1. Airports existed in the days of Roe v. Wade too. But just like back then, most people can’t afford to buy an airplane ticket and take off work to go gallivanting off to another state or country. People may have the “ability” to go elsewhere but that means nothing without money and a job that will give you time off. Abortion has won on a cultural level, but it hasn’t won on a practical level.


            1. I never said economic inequality was resolved. But abortion is a non-issue since it’s done not surgically but with a pill. An increasing number of people work in jobs where “time off” is not something you have to ask for. Even illegal, backroom abortions are no longer mortally dangerous and performed with coat hangers. I instead they are done online and with two little pills.

              We gain nothing by pretending that it’s the same issue that it was in 1973. Because it’s not. The world has changed. The only reason our politicians try to dupe us into believing that abortion is under threat is because they don’t want to do anything about inequality and other real issues.


              1. I’m not sure how easy it is for the average person to get the pill online or if they’ve heard of it. And is the pill you get online even safe? And I know getting the abortion pill from a clinic here is such a hassle that people just get it done surgically. Nationwide, surgical abortion is still far more common than taking a pill. I don’t think the pill is as widespread as you think it is, although it’s more common than I’d thought and I’m pretty sure it will one day become the most common method.

                I agree that economic inequality is the main barrier here though. Five years ago abortion was one of my top issues. Nowadays it’s barely even a factor when I’m deciding who to vote for, at least on the federal level.


        1. Dreher is simply quoting the poster in simple, straight forward English. What’s “salty” about knowing how to read?


            1. Could be, don’t think so. The idea goes back at least to the Wendy Davis race for Texas governor in 2013. Here’s a pic from that campaign:

              The slogan is a take-off from either “Hoes before Bros” or Bros before Hoes” — don’t know which version of that came first.


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