At the Conference

I’ve been sitting here all day, listening how being a mother is this horrible thing when we all know it’s really the best. Why are we saying things we know to be untrue? Even when the writer analyzed expresses great joy at being a mother, we immediately have to conclude that she’s a stupid, brainwashed victim. Sounds like a bit of a projection to me.

11 thoughts on “At the Conference

  1. A variation of this that I have seen a number of times recently is:
    “Lots of women regret having been mothers. After their children are grown up, they realize they only became mothers because of social pressure. We need to normalize women saying they regret motherhood, in the same way as we hear from women who (allegedly!) regret not having had children”, etc.
    Don’t know, I might be a snowflake but I keep thinking of the poor souls who follow through and admit on social media to regretting motherhood, and the children discovering such social media posts before they are of an age to process them in a healthy way.
    My mother never failed to regularly praise the life choices of childless people in front of me when I was still a child and wish she were one of them. But hey, I now consider myself lucky that at least she wasn’t airing it to millions of people on Twitter…

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    1. Who are all these women who had kids only because of social pressure? I got married in 1977, and I was under an insane amount of pressure from all sides to pursue a career outside the home, and either forgo having kids or limit it to one or two and put them in day care so they couldn’t interfere with my career ambitions. Problem was I didn’t have any career ambitions, or any desire to work outside the home. I wanted to be a full-time mother. My sister the fire-breathing feminist never forgave me for having betrayed the sisterhood and thrown my life away. My father, God rest his soul, never forgave me for having wasted his money putting me through college (n.b., me going to college was his idea, not mine) and then not having a career. My in-laws thought it was disgusting that I let their son support me instead of getting a job and helping to pay the bills. Even my college adviser, who had been one of my best friends and my primary moral support during my college days, was disappointed in me. Sigh…

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      1. IKR? My own mother-in-law encourages me, in the friendliest possible way, to get sterilized, every time she visits (and then wonders why we don’t come visit…). Getting married, having more than 2 kids, and forgoing a job to raise them is radically countercultural these days. I’d love to say there were people pressuring me to do it! That would mean I had some kind of social support and cultural approval!

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    2. I spent my whole life hearing how untimely my birth was and how it ruined everything good. A woman who is so damaged that she’s incapable of normal motherly feelings won’t have a problem advertising her dysfunction.

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  2. I was recommended to this BLOG by a regular reader who sadly passed away yesterday. I would really like a password. 🙂

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