By the way, I had my own neurosis surrounding beach vacations. Soviet people tend to have one because beach vacations were a big deal culturally. We went on them as often as we could but we were a sick, broken society, so we accumulated mental traumas in the process.
My beach neurosis was of the same nature as N’s but it manifested physically instead of mentally. I’d have a brilliant time but then exactly at the half-time mark I’d get sick and become incapacitated. If no illness lent itself to my neurosis, I’d start getting injured.
I’ve had everything on these vacations. Bronchitis, severe colds, gallbladder episodes, hypertension, diarrhea, allergic reactions to insect bites, cuts, burns, mysterious limps. Always at the half-time mark and always in the most intense version.
I got this cured. I’m leaving a vacation that I massively enjoyed and during which the worst physical discomfort I suffered was a mosquito bite.