In a hilarious development, you now have to pay to attend the wokest event on campus. Tickets are $50 a pop, which immediately prices out students and staff who have better ways of spending hard-earned $50 than listening to woke speeches for 3 hours.
Since academic departments and programs have received exactly zero dollars and zero cents for the fiscal year that started on July 1, 2022 and can no longer buy even a pack of printer paper without a lengthy bureaucratic process, it’s impossible to buy the tickets with institutional funds.
As a result, the event will become a showcase of who on campus is really scared of losing their job. Nothing but abject fear of demotion or redundancy can motivate people to fork over their own money to be lectured on how evil and oppressive they are.
No, I’m obviously not going. I have marketable skills and great ideas for what to do with my $50.