The Joys of Technology

I haven’t worn headphones for 15 years. I never held any or had any dealings with them. This is why I missed important technological advances that happened in this field.

Harsh life circumstances—also known as a lineup of irresistible books on Audible—forced me to get headphones. I spent a miserable half hour trying to locate the “on” button to turn the little bastards on. Their surface was smooth, though, and no button presented itself. Driven by utter desperation, I placed them into my ears with a vague hope that the button would reveal itself that way. To my shock, the moment the headphones popped into my ears, they started working without any need for an “on” button.

I’m like a savage who came from the woods and discovered the joys of polyethylene. (This is a reference to a family that missed half a century of history in the taiga and, after re-establishing contact with civilization, was impressed by nothing as much as single-use plastic bags).