Power Play

It’s this weird psychological mechanism where positioning yourself as a kindly benefactor to a man whom you fear makes the fear less intense. In your mind, he becomes a sort of a child, and you can’t really be angry with a child, no matter what he does.

What we call “toxic empathy” is not really empathy. It’s a power play. Let’s say, you tell somebody regarding a colleague at work, “Poor Peter. I feel so bad for him. That poor, miserable dude. Let’s be nice to him because he has so few things going for him.” Are you being empathetic towards Peter? Of course, not. You are using him to establish a hierarchy with yourself on top. Those who can pity stand above those who deserve pity. “Poor Peter” translates as “not poor me.”

We need to see these displays of fake empathy for what they really are, a power play.

10 thoughts on “Power Play

  1. I have a suspicion that women have a preference for male immigrants, and men have a preference for female immigrants.

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        1. “…because men don’t gain status from marriage.” anymore, Kid, remember that feminism/communism intended to destroy the natural bonds of the family.

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  2. Hmmm, it may just largely be the female instinct to be kind to everyone to secure the group, even foolishly supporting “refugees” of known dangerous groups. Closer to home, some of it may be just female intrigue or curiousity, particularly if an attractive guy, or his group, has somehow developed a “fast” reputation ;-D

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  3. My dad, who would have loved to have a Viet daughter-in-law (good cooks, respectful of old people), warned me against dating in that community, as it was still culturally OK to hit wives. Said in another generation they’d all just be Americans no problem.

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    1. I’m stunned at how non-racist Americans are. Everybody in my family would have a conniption fit at the mere thought of it. My cousin married a woman from Trinidad, and my aunt has been in mourning for a decade. It doesn’t help that the woman from Trinidad is a child-free “dog Mom.”

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      1. Yeah, not really an issue here. We’ve had emergency family interventions about cousins dating people who were *culturally* inappropriate (loser ex-cons, muslims, married guys), but quite a few people in the family have married outside the WASP profile, and it doesn’t seem to be a problem.

        The same parameters always apply: social class, shared values, compatible temperaments, the usual. Race not really one of the important things. I’d say marrying outside your class is far more hazardous.

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  4. Yeah, most of racial and sexual societal problems would already be solved if the troublemakers stopped ripping open the wounds ;-D

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