Clarissa's Blog

Alexa doesn’t get my accent either. Today she informed me she doesn’t have a song titled “Crush Little Bibi.” Feel free to guess what I actually requested.

Happy New Year, everybody! No pictures of food this time because Klara is getting used to sleeping in a real bed (as opposed to a crib), and it’s not easy. It took us forever to get her settled down, and then everything was rushed after that.

In 2018 I pushed my own boundaries a lot and proved to myself that I’m not too old and crusty to change. It was an exceptionally good reading year, and I hope 2029 will be at least somewhat as good.

Folks, do you know what’s real fun? Asking Alexa to play “Russian music.” It offers the weirdest mix of hardcore Soviet propaganda songs (which were actually really good music and lyrics) and super trashy perestroika-era songs. We are pissing ourselves with laughter here.

I hate AT&T. Which is not a fresh sentiment but I have a new reason to detest it. Its workers were laying cable in my street and somehow made the transformer explode. Now we have no electricity. It’s below freezing, so that’s bad news. The AT&T guy who blew the transformer told me they had no idea how to fix it and just kept digging.

The neighbors next door are having a huge brunch party. The neighbors across the street have a house full of visiting relatives from out of town. They are all very unhappy. Everybody has a fridge full of food for the holidays.

AT&T are dumb fucks.

From a Ukrainian website:

Time management strategies were invented by people who don’t need them for people who are incapable of using them.

Today, I have the following tasks:

1. Workout

2. Pedicurist

3. Two syllabi, one of which is a new preparation.

4. Photocopying texts for the next semester and placing them on BB.

5. Adding 300 words to my MLA talk.

6. Grading at least 6 final essays.

7. Folding laundry.

8. Quality time with family.

The pedicurist always says, “I prefer to work with your sister. She talks to me.” Today she’ll have to work in silence again, unfortunately.

We have this really great thing at the locally owned grocery store where for $19.96 they sell a large box containing four smaller boxes with different kinds of protein. It can be split chicken breasts, pork chops, hamburger, and drumsticks, for example. Each smaller box lasts us two days. So you end up having your protein solved for the whole week for under $20.

And before you decide it’s shitty meat they want to get rid of fast, remember that I’m a great cook. Nobody can palm off bad meat on me.

These protein boxes make me very happy. Yes, I sound crazy. But 98% of what we eat is homemade from scratch. It’s neither easy nor cheap.

Yesterday in the bathtub Klara refused to brush her teeth. Arguing with toddlers is a complete waste of time, so I said, “Hey, let’s brush teeth with toes!” I put a bit of baby toothpaste on her toes and she had a ball brushing her teeth with toes. The whole thing was so funny and put her in such a good mood that she easily agreed to brush her teeth with a toothbrush and real toothpaste after that.

We are trying to fit into 3,5 days in Florida everything we usually do in two weeks here. Today, for example, we went to the beach and the swimming pool twice (in the morning and after the nap). We also visited the fair, had a traditional Thanksgiving dinner that I cooked right here at the hotel, and then drove to the pier for a walk, some dancing for Klara, some shopping for me, and then some more dancing. And in the breaks between these activities, N and I both did some work. N also managed to get to the gym, which I admire but don’t want to imitate.

We are traveling with a toddler, so everything has to be calculated very precisely to fit with her routine.

Tomorrow is our last day here and we have to fit in a trip to Naples, Florida, because I love Naples with an uncommon passion.

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody! I hope you are having fun, too.

At the fair that features a sand sculpture contest, Klara showed no interest in the kiosks that sold clothes, jewelry, toys and treats and insisted, instead, that we stay to listen to a lecture by a sand sculpture artist.

“Be quiet and listen to what the nice gentleman is telling,” she commanded when I started to fidget and whine that I was bored and needed a treat and a toy.

This is heartbreaking. The casual cruelty to very small kids in the name of consumerism is impossible to watch.

We all have to answer difficult questions. I had to explain to Klara where her brother is, why she only has one grandpa and can’t see her other grandma. None of this was easy but I didn’t just lie to her and say they don’t exist. She’s not a toy I bought at a store. She’s a human being who is entitled to infirmation about herself, her origins, and her close relatives.

Consumerism is very scary because people see absolutely nothing but themselves, their momentary whims, and their consumer choices.