I Miss Being Human

I can’t wait for colleagues to come back to work in person. It’s hard to be Chair when everybody is far away. I want to be able to come by a person’s office and ask a question, make a suggestion, say something, etc. Right now, I have to set up a Zoom meeting for every little question that arises. Of course, people get nervous when I ask to schedule a meeting, then they spend the first 10 minutes feeling defensive while I’m explaining that they aren’t in trouble, it’s all good, I just want some advice on the T-shirt design.

Yes, I could do email but everybody is exhausted by email. I want to be able to knock on a friend’s door and say, “hey, do you want to hear something ridiculous?” And then we laugh together and gossip for a while and feel energized for the rest of the day. I miss speaking Spanish, I miss hearing foreign languages around me. And I’m really, really, really tired of screenshots. I want to come across a great quote and go stick the page under somebody’s nose, saying, “read this! Cool, huh?”

We have several new and very troubling initiatives from the administration that I want to discuss with colleagues. I just want to have a normal, unmediated, sincere conversation with somebody. I want to feel human again. I want somebody to be there to notice my new outfit or my new hair color. I want to bitch and laugh and make salty jokes. I want to go for coffee with somebody. I’m planning a completely new course on computer-assisted translation and I’ve started to give long monologues about it to myself because my thinking patterns are very dialogical. I need to address my ideas to somebody and hear feedback.

I even miss the boring department meetings because there would always be something funny to observe and then talk about. Talk! I want to talk! To people! Full-bodied people, not screen heads.

This sucks, people. This really sucks.

9 thoughts on “I Miss Being Human

  1. Here in Alberta🇨🇦, life is back to normal.

    I operate a coffeeshop at a farmers market. Only one vendor is wearing a mask, the rest aren’t. When they lifted off the mask mandate, I expected food and beverage handlers such as myself, to feel obliged to continue wearing the mask. I made a decision neither I nor my staff will. It’s up to each business to decide. And I am very thankful for that. I probably had 2 customers during the past week, wearing masks, and they were elderly. I respect everyone’s choice.

    Loving seeing friends approaching us to purchase a beverage while smiling and talking…You sense the joy around. People are finally free.

    Folks here are at restaurants and bars just like before. Social distancing is encouraged, however friends and families etc can gather anywhere they please. No limit on how many.

    Clubs are all open. Stampede (Canada’s biggest outdoor show) is in full swing.

    Again, very thankful I live in this province. The contrast between here and rest of Canada, couldn’t be more astonishing.


    Liked by 1 person

    1. “The contrast between here and rest of Canada…”

      Ontario’s public health establishment is (feverishly?) trying to whip up support for continuing “health” restrictions this coming fall and winter in support of the wacky wokester cult of zero COVID.


      To illustrate, this morning we have Ontario’s chief medical bureaucrat warning that a (presumably) fully conscious and malevolent “Delta strain will seek out unvaccinated individuals” thereby creating a deadly reservoir of plague.

      Now that a majority of the adult population in Canada has been vaccinated, it’s “younger age groups” that are of most concern to the zero COVID cultists in general and Ontario’s Chief Medical Officer of Health Dr. Kieran Moore in particular.

      “They’re a key metric [in the coming fall ‘surge’], because they’re the ones that are going to be going to high schools, to colleges, to universities, to workplaces, and potentially, unbeknownst to them, if they’re carrying the virus without symptoms, spreading it in those environments,” he claims.


      “The virus without symptoms…” OMG OMG OMG… (this is absolutely far, far scarier than a zombie apocalypse because at least with the zombies one can readily see who’s infected…)

      Truth be told, however, Canadians from coast to coast to coast (including Alberta) have been lapping up this sort of nonstop nonsense double-talk from their elites for the past a year and a half.

      It’s tremendously popular, pays huge dividends to the political classes, and goes mostly uncontested in public communications. Case in point, according to a very recent public opinion survey only 15% of Canadians want their land border with the U.S. opened immediately (in the same survey, a further 14% courageously agreed to concede that “this summer” would be OK, eh?).

      Liked by 1 person

      1. This is what my sister who lives in Canada says. These measures are immensely popular. People are clamoring for them. I don’t disbelieve her but it’s so hard for me to understand. Why is this virus producing such terror?

        I’m a mega hypochondriac who finds every symptom of every exotic disease in myself. I have to stop myself from googling diseases and self-diagnosing. I go batshit crazy when my kid scrapes her knee. Most people aren’t neurotic in this way. But they completely freaked out over COVID and I just don’t get it. Why COVID and not diabetes? Cancer? Cardiovascular disease? Regular flu? Traffic accidents? Why this? It’s so random. We will all die and most of us will die of cardiovascular disease. But nobody gives a toss. It’s not like these are very health conscious people if we look at obesity or alcohol consumption rates.

        COVID has become a major life interest for people. They can’t talk about anything else but their irrational fears. If somebody talked about cancer the way everybody talks about COVID, we’d call them a neurotic and avoid that person.


        1. “I don’t disbelieve her but it’s so hard for me to understand.”

          Very briefly, this is how I see it.

          1) Canadians, far more than Americans, have, for deep historical reasons rooted in reaction to the American Revolution, been far more deferential to their elites than Americans.

          2) Traditionally, Canadian elites were never united on all major public policy questions. Indeed, Westminster institutions are built on the concept of “loyal opposition” – the government proposes, the opposition on principle opposes and liberal democracy rests on periodic elections that allow the public to alternate their governing elites.

          3) In the last quarter century or so, Canada’s elites – political, media, academic, legal – have all become to various degrees woke. The public remains deferential but the regime is no longer fully liberal democratic as significant policy choices have been removed from the public and public debate.

          4) On COVID, Canada’s wokester elites have spoken mostly as one. There is no visible opposition with a secure institutional footing. And, COVID “terror” has worked super well in furthering the interests of the wokester party in Canada as elsewhere in the west.

          Liked by 1 person

      2. Truth be told, however, Canadians from coast to coast to coast (including Alberta) have been lapping up this sort of nonstop nonsense double-talk from their elites for the past a year and a half.” Yup. Pretty much. I can’t and won’t argue with that. Our premier ‘used to be’ semi ok at his response to the plague. Then, he switched and locked us down. Well that didn’t go very well for him in rural communities especially (which is basically his base to get re-elected). So now?! He switched again to opening up pretty much ‘everything’. How life changed overnight, I cannot even begin to describe! Do we have our fair-share of covid crazies in AB?! Yup, we do.

        Our pathetic federal government, our deranged dimwit of a prime minister, is a disgrace to this country. The provinces and municipalities across Canada, have exercised a variety of different lunatic legal powers in response to COVID-19. The lockdowns have raised significant constitutional questions specific to freedom of assembly. Small business crumbled and many and their families fell victims… yet their cheers supporting the lockdown, were a blatant teller ‘this country is in deep deep trouble! And it’s not because of COVID ’.

        Canada has so far not invoked the federal Emergencies Act and all national COVID-19 legislation has been passed just as easily as one devours their plate of poutine. Charter statements have therefore been inline with every COVID-19 bill that became law.

        Again, I agree with everything you said about Canada in general including AB, however, these days…are honestly just like normal! Is it temporary!? My cynicism says perhaps most likely. Is it simply a tactic to please his disgruntled constituents who were/are quite vocal about their displeasure with him?! Probably! Am I ‘happy’ lately even if my naïveté is screaming ‘I maybe fooled!’?! Yes.

        I never expected this thirst for freedom to be this consuming. And with this mirage of it suddenly thrown at us poor citizens! One can see how one can be intoxicated very quickly.


    2. That’s really great, Kat! Right now at work, I passed a group of building workers who were fixing a leak in the ceiling. As they saw me approach, they reluctantly pulled on their masks. Two of them had to drop the tools they were holding to do that. “It’s OK!” I yelled. “Please! You really don’t have to!” But they know I’m a professor and professors have been real assholes about mask mandates, snitching on workers and creating all sorts of drama.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I hear you! I have 2 professor friends with-home I used to visit regularly prior to covid. I always enjoyed our intelligent conversation (I did a lot of listening as they bantered back and forth about architecture and design. Now?! I am absolutely shocked at how absolutely terrified they’ve been acting. It reached a point, when one of them asked me bluntly if I’m vaxed. My response! ‘Hey ….., happy to 3 way txt and converse if we stick to subjects that do not include the plague’. He had no choice but to oblige and I had no choice in hiding my irritation. But yah, I hear you. It seems the educated are the extreme glutinous ones towards all the fear and the nonsense.


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